oh what a day!

my day started with a very lazy me lazing in my bed till the very VERY last minute. 7.45am. by that time, had no other choice. MUST wake up. pfft. trust me, if i didn't have a conscience the size of a carl jr's burger, i would have continued lazing in bed.

did my thing and drove off to uni where i met up with erika. she damn nice. she brought me some korean/japanese/sushi-lookalike-but-not-quite rice with salmon that tasted like tuna but was really just fishy dish that her neighbour made. regardless of who made the thing, she was thoughtful enough to think of me. i. am. so. touched *a single tear drops wtf

it was damn good. even my friends said so. i gave them a bite each. and i also had bubble tea. milk tea. the original. i luv it but it's so sweet its diabetic inducing. i even said so in my FB and twitter status "bubble tea quota full this week. anymore n diabetes will come a-knocking!" heh.

ok fast forward to authorship lecture. i tell you, never fail i will surely fall asleep in class. NEVER. FAIL. sumpah i.

even with the thought of andrew returning our assignments never stopped me in fear of falling asleep in lecture. actually, lecture and returning of assignments no connection. but anyways, yes, i was trying my hardest to stay awake. FAIL full stop.

second hour of lecture came and that was when the death days of many came +___+ my sincere condolences to those who were unsuccessful. i know and feel your pain. trust me. living example here.

i wasn't really worried about it till andrew started ticking off things we did wrong in the essay and when my friend who shall not be named was fidgeting beside me. those two combination together sent me straight to hell. i almost couldn't breathe when andrew started calling out names. my heart beat was S-L-O-W-I-N-G D-O-W-N. i could see the white light at the end of the tunnel. *dub dub*

name after name after name. mine was like the second to last to be called. why don't you just stab in the heart la? faster that way. or shoot me la. i'll feel no pain. i think. that's how it is in the movies right? shoot the heart and then...die. it felt like ETERNITY i swear. and it didn't help that the bunch of people in front of me were already getting their results back and were overjoyed they didn't fail. hello, dying back here, andrew!

finally...judgement day came.

i was surprisingly calm. i never really thought about what would happen if i failed it again. maybe a part of me was confident enough that i was going to be able to pull this off the second time round or maybe i was just going to wing and let whatever happens happen or maybe i put my faith in Him to know that i will get through this. whatever it was, i was prepared.

i took my paper from andrew not daring to flip straight to the last page. instead i turned the paper over and tried to see it from the back.

double digit *woot*
first digit didn't start with a zero *woot woot*
first digit looked like a number bigger than 2 *woot woot woot*

i went back to my seat, sad down and slowly turned back to the last page.

all i can say is victory never tasted so sweet. i may not have achieved an HD or even a D but the thought of managing to pull this off the second time was the most sweetest victory i ever had. that was my battle for the past year and a almost half. you have no idea how dejected i was when i found out my results last year. no words. seriously. i remembered telling my friend i was not going to be able to join them for a birthday celebration because i was just too depressed. i cried. i didn't dare tell my parents. i was a failure. the only comfort i can salvage for my own self preservation was that i trust it was His plan for me. not necessarily the failing part but His plan nonetheless.

now, i can only give glory to His name! for without Him i would not have been able to pull this off. i literally worked all night long on the essay. through my 21st. yes. the daytime of my 21st will be remembered for the blood, sweat and tears of toiling away on the essay.

i might not be excellent but that doesn't bother me. i strive to be an average student. so sue me.

i drove home feeling damn proud of myself. messaged a friend and called another.

whilst driving i decided to reward myself for my excellent progress in my world of academia that i went to the times warehouse sale. bought myself 6 books for rm45. can you say dude, whoaaaaa?

alot of latest books only had a 30% discount. don't know if it's worth it or not. so i bought the 3 for rm10 and 3 other books for rm10 and rm15 each. at least now i have something non-academic to read.

my dear friend called me when i was browsing. wanted to discuss an assignment so she came to look for me.

after discussing, we went to the toilet. once we stepped in, the lady janitor told us not to wet the floor.

@_______@

double eww tee eff.

we probably looked like 5 year old BOYS entering the ladies toilet.

she made my day.