she's my winona

remember as a child, you would dream of that barbie dream house that your parents just refuse to get for you? you would go to bed dreaming about it and then you would wake up all excited and run down stairs like it's christmas morning and santa has just brought in the mother load. you have a big wide smile plastered on your 5 year old face and you will quietly and quickly descend the stairs in your pyjamas, only to find reality slapping you in the face. oh fudge, it was only a dream. and then you go up to your room feeling dejected and maybe slightly embarrassed but thankfully no one was awake to witness it.

yeah. childhood. how i miss thee so.

many times as i grow older, i dream dreams. dreams that make my heart aflutter. dreams that make my heart pound. dreams that make my heart cry. not cause it was a bad dream but cause i had to wake up from it. i could never dream the same dream again. it only happens once and then poof, it's gone. stored temporarily in my memory bank only to find itself slowly seeping away, fading into an abyss. but then somedays, the dreams just come back and hit me, unconsciously and then i try as hard as i can to remember details about the dream. but with each try to fill in the blanks, i change the dream and then i end up creating something new out of the old, eliminating whatever memory i had about the old dream.

i gasp for air. my grip loosening. images fading.

if only we can burn dreams into a dvd and watch it whenever we want. how did stephenie meyer do it?! (she dreamt of that scene in the meadow and look at where that has her led to now, robert pattinson and taylor lautner; shirtless). not that i want to write a book from my dream although sometimes when i take a nap, it feels like i've just watched a james bond movie! i kid not. i've dreamt of car chases and kidnapped plots in my nap times +__+ i could make a predictable action flick from it wtf.

there are some dreams where i just want to keep but memory just won't allow it.

screen fades to black. the curtains call.