the lion does a dance

my cheeks are stained red not from the liquid blusher but from the scorching hot sun i had the most unfortunate chance of standing under one fine day. adding salt to the wound, i didn't put on my spf40 sunblock. and now, here i am nursing sunburnt cheeks that stings when i apply layer after layers of moisturizer. if there's a time to say fml, this is one of the times.

now i can save myself 30 seconds or less in the morning. i don't have to apply blusher. i now have naturally red cheeks. that sometimes hurt when dry air ie. aircond blows at it.

why was i standing under the sun?









lion dance :D

they have crazy stunts now like jumping from pole to another effortlessly as if they eyes at the back of their behinds/ass :O

way too cool for ya!

come to momma, you, ray ban wayfarers!















pictures courtesy of *click*

i covet!

Tung Tung Tung Chang!!!

chinese new year day 2 was spent a visiting.

house-hopping wtf. one of the great customary traditions of the new year celebrations. i don't know about you but my plans for dieting and exercising are thrown out the window. i don't know how anyone can resist all that food glorious food. looks like i can only start my grand plan after the 15 days of celebrations/sigh, willpower damn cannot make it. but whatev's man. i missed last year's celebrations, i ain't missing this years too,yo!

another great thing is the receiving of the angpaus. who doesn't like it when people give you money in bright shiny red packets? i like to see the various red packet designs people use. some are traditional looking whilst there are those that are unique. i usually keep those that are pretty looking.

then there are the lion dance/dragon dance/tiger dance(?) the whole shingding. the loud drums and cymbals and the crazy jumping from one tiny pole to another. you gotta love it. plus the firecrackers and fireworks. last night alone i saw/heard a few of em'. people are willing to spend on these theatrical showpieces. it's like burning your money, literally. but hey, makes the kids happy and it does bring home the festivities of it all so why not. plus it's only once a year. from my bedroom window i saw two fireworks. pretty awesome stuff :) i wanted to take pictures but everytime i clicked, the fireworks boomed into oblivion so i never got to catch them/ like trying to catch a shooting star +___+

and then there's the yee sang. omg i used to hate them with a vengeance but now i look forward to this dish every year! i've had them twice already/prances around cause i'm a happy child.

i like how this celebration brings people together. yeah, we can always go visit one another any other day but somehow for the new year's, people make that extra effort to go visiting and planning dinners to celebrate the new years together. i used to think that cny was only a two day celebration cause it says so in the calendars wtf but little did i know that it's a fifteen day celebration, no wonder we still got angpaus even after the two day period :O chinese history is actually pretty interesting. when i was in taiwan, i enjoyed my visit to the national palace museum tremendously despite it being super crowded. all those artifacts and stories behind them were really interesting. makes me understand my kulh-ture!

13 more days of celebration!

prances around like a happy child :DDD

they call it special k. i call it a-ok.

i need a weight loss plan. right now, at the top of my head, i can think of kellogg's special k.

i'm not aiming to be skinny but there are a few kilos i could do without and a toned body helps with my self-image and confidence too.

what is NOT helping my situation at all is that the CNY celebrations are just around the corner. how can i resist? all that temptation and i'm only just to sit by and watch people eat? not in this lifetime.

but hell no. i need to do this. otherwise i'll be on this downward spiral to becoming all flabby.

NOT. IN. THIS. LIFETIME. NO WAY.

sigh. maybe after CNY, perhaps?

can you see what i'm working with? mampus ku.

a time for merry making

customer service is really a drag when you're not into it. the effort to smile and sing praises and wax lyrical is enough to put a bullet through your brains.

but then again, you get to meet and talk to people you will NEVER ever regularly meet or talk to in any other situation. the up side i suppose. the down side, there ain't no time for you to be all mr. or in this case, ms. grouch. if you're a grouch, you're only digging yourself a deeper hole into the grouchyland and it ain't a place where dreams come true ala the other place ruled by a mus musculus. it ain't pretty.

just keep smiling, just keep smiling :)

though you would really just want to go shove a shovel up their ass.

it ain't a retreat baby, no siree.

i came home today feeling extremely guilty about having toasted twister, cheesy wedges and pepsi for dinner that i immediately put on my running shoes, popped in a dvd and hopped/not exactly more like grudgingly walked my way to the treadmill.

first of all, this is very unnatural character or behaviour on my part because i NEVER apologize for having me some cheesy wedges or the occasional pepsi/not the diet kind please, the regular 7 tablespoons of sugar thanks. so what brought on this guilt trip?

because it's true. i'm putting on the fat suit and it ain't pretty. don't tell me otherwise cause that will just land you a slap in your ass. as i sat eating that toasted twister, my mind began envisioning the fats and calories my body is piling and just sitting idly there :( not the vision you want to see when enjoying a piece of cheesy wedges. FTS i'm turning into those people that watch out for what they eat. i can't do that. i've always prided myself in being able to resist the pressure of watching what i eat and just eat what i want cause life is too short. one thing i know for sure and is my mission to accomplish is to get in shape. that is my life motto for now. say goodbye to unhealthy food and bring on the steamed vegetables and proteins and even special k diet/the kellogs cereal that promises me that i'll lose a jeans size in 2 weeks :D i'm pulling out all the stops now till i get my desired target. despite it being cookies season now, i will prevail and go against the odds/rawrrr.

one thing i realize now that i have a tv to take my attention away from the running is that it makes it that much/to be honest la ok, only slighly easier. but hey, i'll take slightly easier any other day! at least now i don't do the 5 minute countdown, countingdown every 5 minutes till i finish. but man, i feel damn good after the run cause that means i'm o.oooo1 step into getting into shape :))))

so to inaugurate my run today, i put on couple's retreat.




one word:

SERIOUSLY?!

i don't know what the people behind this movie were thinking/heck even the people in the poster! to make a movie like this is to just point and jeer at audiences because it seriously felt like they were testing our patience and intelligence by producing such a piece of crap. i would have understood and heck even appreciated it more if it had drunkenly shameless sex addicted college kids in the movie instead of vince vaughn or kirsten bell or even kristin davis/charlotte from sex and the city, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING INVOLVING YOURSELF IN THIS CRAP THEY TRY TO CALL A MOVIE?!

i don't even know why they bother in the first place. the jokes are so damn funny i laughed on the inside. the plot/storyline so predictable i can write, produce, direct and act it with my eyes closed and hands tied behind my back with my ass strapped on a cactus O___0 i am making claims like these because really that's what the movie made me feel.

i ain't saying it's easy to film, direct, produce, act but really, why even make THIS movie?! what are they trying to sell? couples need to go on a terrible vacation in order to realize that they love each other?! honey, have you heard of couple's therapy?! or even COMMUNICATION! cause they basically did all of that AFTER making US go through inappropriate yoga poses and old, overweight men guitar hero-ing and flirting with younger women and making ass jokes regarding relationships. what the crap. gimme my money back.

the only positive outcome of watching this piece of fiction is that i am now 200plus calories lesser :D and i have a way positive outlook on life, mainly because i'm not involved in any way of the making of the movie, which really, is a cause of celebration, don't you think?

it's the year of the tiger, RAWR

chinese new year is next week!

unbelievable. a month ago, we were celebrating the new year. and now, it's the festive season! the malls are all adorned with red lanterns and angpow packets and those flowers that you only see during this season and the music is all 'tung-tung-TUNG-CHANG' which IMHO really sets the mood for the season :)

gotta love this celebration! where else can you eat excessively without feeling guilty and buy new clothes/ok not so this one cause we buy new clothes every other days anyways so this doesn't count but you know what i mean and also get red packets aka ang pow. seriously, a festive season where we makan makan and get $$$ at the same time! best days in the calendar besides xmas and birthdays!

i especially love that all the cookies are out in those plastic with red covered containers are all over the place. that's one of the indications that chinese new year is coming soon :D and the yee sang! ZOMG THE YEE SANG! i used to hate that and only ate the crackers that they sprinkled on top! but now, i look forward to eating yee sang every time chinese new years is around the corner like how people wait for mcd's prosperity burger around the same time. i had my first prosperity burger this year by the way. love the curly fries! not so much the burger. gimme my double cheeseburger or spicy chicken mcdeluxe any day man. slurp!

i may show my disdain when they tell me we'll be balik-ing kampung but really i am secretly super excited about it! despite me complaining about the horrid weather/super duper hot i actually love it especially eating the home cooked food my grandmother makes and the chicken! ZOMG the pak cham kai! fresh kampung chicken make my mouth drools. i think i just made myself sound very unattractive but i don't care. when it comes to food, no two ways about it.

but really i love the festive feeling chinese new year brings. the dinners, the visitings, the gathering of families. joy!

i hope the year of the tiger will be a good one for me :)

and you :D

for your entertainment

when i was working in the states, the only language problem i encountered was Spanish.

here, i cower in fear when people start speaking in mandarin. i can only say a few basics and that's it. heck even 1-10 in mandarin is tough for me. i have to mentally count from 1-10 all the time especially to tell the difference between 6 and 9. don't ask why but it's difficult +___+

so as part of my new year's resolution, i am picking up mandarin :) and since then i am slowly practicing the language. hopefully by the end i'll be able to carry a conversation but that seems a little too far fetched. i shall persevere and come out triumphant ROARRRR >:D wahh check out my smiley!

i wonder if i can count 1-10 in spanish/mentally counts.

can can :D wahh not bad not bad. still got me some skillz wtf. maybe not in order laa but i can definitely count from 1-5. RESPEK.

it's not easy learning mandarin. the proper way too! being malaysian, the mandarin here is damn rojak. try speaking it the proper way. pffft. make your momma cry, i say! but after every lesson, my confidence level in speaking is 0.1% increasing.

positive growth ok.

i remember trying to learn some basic spanish. wahsehh, not easy ok. i do still know how to say 'one for 15, two for 20'. oh the memories! lots of finger pointing and hand signs but eventually the message got across though it took a lot of time! for mandarin, i kinda have to guess what they are saying after catching one or two words that i know in that whole lotta sentences +___+ and most times, i don't necessarily answer their question.

i try.

so now, i aim to widen my mandarin vocab by watching and listening to more taiwanese dramas/songs!

recommend me shows to watch and songs to listen to :) help me not make a fool of myself in the future. nothing jay chou please. according to my friend, even the chinese educated can't understand what he's saying in his songs +___+

i actually find that hilarious! nothing against him. i do think he is very yeng/thumbs up x 2

ehh, i just remembered i watched princess & the frog last night. FINALLY!



i guess everyone was right. it was alright. good but not great. i kinda expected more. more epic songs and epic love but not so epic. mediocre. i do love the songs though. very jazzy. makes me wanna go to new orleans :) there, it shall be on my list of places to visit. the funny sidekick was not so funny and the villain not so villain-y. the prince and the princess, 3/4 of the ENTIRE film in frog form. not very attractive but then again i like lion king so who am i to judge.





although lions do look better than frogs. i digress.

i thought there were alot of plot holes in the film and felt that they just made the film for the sake of making a princess film. one that uses the traditional/classical hand-drawn form to boot!

if i'm not wrong the last classic princess film was...

/scratch head.

all hail wikipedia cause according to their list, mulan was the last princess. an asian princess! REPRESENT!



anyone remember the part where wushu said he wasn't a lizard? i remember laughing so hard at that i peed in my pants.

Mulan: My ancestors sent a little lizard to help me?
Mushu: Hey! Dragon. *Dragon*, not lizard. I don't do that tongue thing.

he's a dragon and no i didn't pee in my pants, you beetch.

the hooha surrounding the princess & the frog was that tiana didn't have enough of a screen time to be fully called the first african-american princess. she did only become a princess in the last 5 minutes of the film but hey, who needs a fictional princess when you have beyonce to represent. damnson, that girl can do no wrong!

i just came to realize that disney makes falling in love seem so easy! no wonder my view is skewered and unrealistic, sorta but whatever, i hold on to hope that i too shall be a disney princess one day with the right dress and makeup. it's always the DRESS! think belle in beauty and the beast and ariel in the little mermaid and aurora in the sleeping beauty. pfft. see how little girls should not watch disney princesses? all this carries on till you're in your twenties :/ and will live forevermore in our minds.









see! proof!

/wails.

no wonder some girls want a big, poofy, white dress to wear on their wedding.

it's all disney's fault.

zip your lip with a padlock

one of my ny resolution is to not give a damn what people think. i can't go around pleasing every single soul out there and let myself be the one bearing the burden of it all. at the end of the day, i'm the one who gets hit with the shit at the end of the fan.

do you feel on somedays where things are just fine and you have nothing to be worried about or nothing to be sulky about because things are moving along perfectly but somehow at the end of the day you just feel restless or incomplete or unsatisfied or just plain blah? i don't know how to put into words what i'm trying to say but let's just say you start thinking about the past, present and future and you see and feel is bleakness and emptiness. can you imagine that? that sorta feeling of nothingness that just brings a heavy burden to your heart. as if you can feel your heart being weighed down but you can't pinpoint what's weighing it down.

i'm having one of those moments where i just want to cry. not for any particular reason but just to release whatever that's pent up inside though what i'm keeping inside, i have no real idea. all i know is that i have some thing to release from the inside and the only outlet i feel where i can let it all out is by crying. hard core sobbing too! i remember reading somewhere that crying show's that you are alive, not sissy/coward or something along those lines. maybe that's what i need. to know that i'm ALIVE.

stuck in a rut. that's it. i think i'm crying because i feel like i'm stuck in a rut. like my life is going nowhere. it's the pressure from life itself. from the structure that we have all somehow agreed upon in the contract of life and how it should progress. the perfect system that i want to breakfree from yet feel so lost and alone when i'm one step out of the system. the window to the other side promises me something stable and safe. something i will willingly go through because everyone is doing it. that's what will make my life better somehow. but i don't want to. at least i think i don't want to. only God knows what i want because right now, i don't know. i'm really upset. i wish i can talk about this nothingness. so intangible. nothing to grasp on. so out there yet so in here. so vague yet so familiar. how would i even begin describing it?

maybe i'm just hungry and i'm trying to distract my mind from the hunger by conjuring up crazy shit about nothingness and emptiness.

i'm blaming my hunger for this post. i don't even know what i'm trying to say :/ maybe in the morning i will.

after breakfast wtf.

BRAID, the musical

twenty plus years and never have i.

never have i done such drastic change.

change that fortunately has been pretty good.

good that i think to myself, why hadn't i done this earlier?

earlier like right after secondary school and that mass exam the gov makes us take, making us believe that life and death depended on this very exam but i digress. earlier like how my peers all started to transform.

transform gradually, first the length then the colours then the styles.

styles that i can only admire from afar/because i was too cowardly to do anything about mine.

afar no more. after twenty plus years, i can proudly/maybe not, depends on which side of the coin you're looking at. i can now say that i no longer have virgin hair/never been touched hair.

hair has now been styled differently from the one that i have been born with. genetically given. God given. i have gone against my own belief and done the most drastic thing i can ever do to myself unless i go get piercings in various parts of my body or get a tattoo which i doubt i will ever do, this will have to be the most DRASTIC thing i can do :/

friends have told me that they love how straight and shiny my hair is.

now i have none of those :(

which makes me quite sad but damn i'm loving this new do! twenty plus years and finally a change! waited too long for this. WAYYY too long.

kravings

i had dimsum for breakfast. i wanted egg tarts but they didn't have them so i had to wait.

i kept turning my head towards the direction of the kitchen hoping, anticipating for that plate of egggy goodness stuffed in a pastry puff but it never came.

till the end of the meal did i see my egg tarts. loads of them too. FML. i was too full and mad to bother.

so now i'm left craving for egg tarts at 2am +_____+

boys over flowers

i'm gonna be shameless and let you in on what i'm obsessing over now :O



i'm currently on episode 22. there are a total of 25 episodes. and right now, i am kinda slowing down cause i don't want it to end +____+ what am i gonna do after watching finish the show?!

oh right, buy myself a social life that's what.

honestly, i wouldn't have watched it if my mother did not tell me about it. she was gushing to me about how the guys were prettier than the girls :O damn straight! so many pretty boys in one show, how can i not watch? now i have the impression that korean guys are all prettier than the girls but then i think again how can that be when korean girls are all damn pretty too +__+ honestly, korean's are a pretty lot full stop. with or without plastic surgery. okay let's not go there laa. we all know how big that industry is over there.

if you've watched the taiwanese version, meteor garden, then you'll know that this has the same storyline. i watched the taiwanese version and fell in love with F4, the boyband as well as the fictional characters. i know there's a japanese version of it as well and if i'm hardworking enough i might just try and get my hands on it too but then again i think it has been fairly established that i'm not as hardworking as i would like to think i am.


meteor garden


japanese version with the same title

thanks to pui yan, i have the (almost) complete episodes! every night i look forward to watching one episode. seriously, that's the highlight of my day. to go home and watch one episode! and if i cannot control, i will watch 2 episodes in one night. i have to limit myself because one episode takes up one hour of my life. not 42 minutes like one tree hill or glee. 60 minutes okay, don't play play with me. i have to literally time myself when watching at night. if not i will get the sounding of my life for waking up at 12pm +_____+

what to do? my life literally revolves around this right now. until i watch finish and move on to the next show.

how i met your mother season 2 to season 5 :DD



and the cycle begins.

again.

teeheehee :D

there's a bee stuck in the blinds

i woke up to the sound of buzzing.

bzzz bzzz BZZZ...

at first i thought it was a fly zooming around my room. i was still too asleep to really bother with the sound till i couldn't sleep sleep cause the sound was so bloody annoying at 7 in the morning. so i got up and listened, trying to find the source. what i found did not prepare me, especially at such an early hour in the morning!

if it were a dragonfly, i don't think i would have been that scared but it was a bee. a BEE! as in the one that makes honey and stings when provoked! immediately i got goosebumps all over. i would have screamed bloody murder right then and there when i saw it stuck in between the blinds and closed window but i had a sore throat and i didnt want to strain my already strained throat. so i did the next best thing; grabbed the shieldtox next to my bed and sprayed at the bee like my life depended on it. all the while doing it, the sound of the buzzing and the sight of it gave me the geli-ness i cannot tahan. ask me what sound i hate and the sound of a bee buzzing will be right on the top.

the bee was already disoriented as it is probably being stuck in between the blinds and closed window for too long so i waited till it was far from the latch before i bravely stuck my hands through the blinds and opened the window so the bee could fly OUT!

traumatic morning. really. i wouldn't wish it on anyone else. imagine finding a bee in your room at 7 in the morning!

the thing that puzzles me is, how did the bee get into my room in the first place? and how the hell did it get stuck between the blinds and window? can a bee fly so high in the first place?

honestly, i don't think i want to know. at least i got a really interesting dream from it. or not. was it before the bee or after the bee that i had the dream? doesn't matter. random dream but totally awesome.

like i said, 2010 is gonna be a great year.

far and wide

now i know why people take 2 to 3 months or even more to travel europe. a train ride just to the south of france from paris already takes 21 hours (i might be mistaken but that's the average time period of traveling) heck, even to the next neighbouring country can take 3 days wtf!

here i am only allocating a month! looks like i won't be seeing all of europe after all. so ambitious! but then again, at least i'm going to places i really really want to visit like france and turkey! omg i getting exciteds now :DD

i was pretty pissed that i missed the MAS promo. AGAIN! second time i missed it. now i'm relying on the upcoming MATTA fair or hopefully another MAS promo they love to throw out in the hopes of competing with airasia. keep them coming, i say!

furthermore, i have people coming at me asking me to go to melbourne and another telling me to go to japan! wahh, i living the life of the rich and femes wtf cause apparently money grows on trees and picking season is in may wtf. if only, people, if only. but i shall work hard and find me some additional work to do to support my rich and femes lifestyle otherwise i will sleep on the streets and search through garbage cans for that piece of french fry! or GASP eat frozen sausages cos that's the cheaper alternative!

cannot cannot.

GMH

epic fail.

obviously my previous post of posting the video failed. but i'm gonna leave it there so that you can click on the link and go watch the awesome video. plus there's many others just like it.

greatness cos the love stories are all REAL. none of those fantasy wishy washy stuff that only happens in the reel world.

sigh, gives me hope.

i knew there's a reason why i love bubble tea!

Pat & Ley Cinematic Prewedding Film "Bubble Tea" from Paper Cranes Productions on Vimeo.

Pat & Ley Cinematic Wedding Trailer from Paper Cranes Productions on Vimeo.

if this doesn't make you cry, i don't know what will.

gives me hope.

one foot in the door, the other in the window

it's day 3 of the new year. at the rate i'm going, i might be blogging everyday. consistently/hopefully. at the stroke of midnight too. but whatevs, so long as you have something to read, everyday and i have something to write, everyday.

i met an old friend today. she looked well. we exchanged a few pleasantries and then she left. before this, when we were young kids, we were so close we were inseparable. we did many things together. we went over to each others house every week. i knew her family and she knew my family. this probably went on for about 2-3 years. and then, i can't remember when but we saw less and less of each other till we never saw. maybe we were growing apart. maybe we were just not into the same things anymore. after all, nobody is ever the same. people change. and maybe that was just it, we changed. now, i barely know this person anymore. sure, she looks the same. but underneath that, below the surface is a stranger. i do wish things didn't turn out the way it did. who knows, we could still be the best of friends. but seeing as how things have turned out, it doesn't seem like we can really really reclaim what we had last time. they are now memories, stored in a shoe box placed in the hidden corners of my darkening past. it's becoming harder to find that box and the contents are fading leaving blurred images and traces of shadows, of fading ink on paper, a love letter of sorts to the lives and times of the good and the bad.

it is rather unfortunate that the people we meet in our lifetime don't necessarily stay with us throughout our life span. i'm sure i had a best friend in kindergarten and i'm positively sure i had great friends in my primary years but things happen and circumstances lead to separation. one thing was and is for sure. throughout my lifetime, i was NEVER alone. i always had friends around me. close friends at various times of my life. and till this very day, i still do.

i guess friends are like treasures. once you have them, you gotta keep them safe and locked up in a place where you'll never lose them. because once you lose them, they will be forever lost. friends need to be cherished. sure, they can be annoying and irritating and be total idiots at one point of time or another but hey, if they're annoying to you, you're annoying to them too. it's a mutual relationship. no hierarchy. no kings and queens.

with facebook, lost friends are easily found. but like every lost things, you lose a certain attachment to them. you suddenly feel you gotta make a huge effort to say hello on their facebook wall and then when they say hello in reply, you stop there not because you're rude but because suddenly, what once felt so effortless now takes brain space, space you don't necessarily have to spare, effort you don't really wanna take. because you start to think, what's the point? you're probably not gonna see this person in the flesh. ever. and you don't have the time anyways cause as it is, you don't even have the time to meet the friends that you do actually have. so why even bother? a hello on the facebook wall tells the other person that you acknowledge their presence. the presence they once had in your life and the ones you will have virtually/birthday wish on the wall every year. maybe a few light conversations and that will be the end of it fullstop

but then, there is always an exception or maybe THIS is the exception/whatever rocks your boat. i could be wrong and maybe i'll meet an old friend and when we meet unexpectedly, we'll immediately fall back into our old rhythm and it will be as if we never parted. yes, there is that exception.

there definitely is.

so treasure the friends you have and the ones you'll meet. don't let them be strangers after having an established relationship. from being strangers to friends to becoming strangers again, is really the most unfortunate thing that can and will happen. and maybe that's the way life is and that's the way we learn and grow but after all that is said and done, i take comfort in the fact that i had friends and will continue having them. they were part of my growing years and that i cannot take away. despite being locked up in an old shoe box with dust and many years eating away at the corners of the cover and the colours and words fading an old photograph, at least i know that it was there. that it was real and that it existed like the dinosaurs and the cavemens and the emperors and pharaohs and the men of sparta.

the history channel, ch. 555

gimme the lights, camera and action

the guys from wongfu productions inspire me to start fiddling with my camera. what say you if i started vlogging/videologging?

imma be a hit sensation and have a huge following and be a celebrity and write adverts to pay my bills.

not.

i detests those forms of advertising. and yet i'm interested in stepping into that industry. go figure. but for realz, i don't like to read adverts on "popular" blog sites. sure, i do read them "popular" blogs. define the term "popular". i don't know these people yet i find a fascination with their lives. voyeurism? perhaps. sell out? pays the bills apparently. well, the world does revolve around money so any chance you get, you take. doesn't mean i havta like it.

there are only a handful of blogs that i read. i used to have a bookmark on all the blogs i read but when my comp crashed, so did the lists of bookmarks. now, all i do is type in the first alphabet of the blog and click from there. there are times i don't remember who to read and there are times where i go on a clicking frenzy. reading random people's blogs. the space in my memory is very limited. so limited that when i'm reading through a blog and when i think of a blog i want to read next that by the time i think and the time i take to aim my mouse on the search bar to type in the blog add, i forget which blog it was that i decided to go to next. then i'll spend the next 5 minute wrecking my brain trying to remember where i chose to go. it happens ALL the time.

and it has spread-ed to the shower as well. one minute i'm pumping the soap bottle, the next i'm rinsing it off and the next thing i know, i'm thinking to myself, have i used soap?

is there a lack of a certain nutrient in my system or am i just getting old and suffering from memory loss? i shudder at the thought of the latter. inevitable sure but doesn't mean i'm liking it and welcoming it with arms wide open/creed.

so what was i saying before this?

oh right. wongfu productions inspire me. doesn't hurt at all that philip wang is so damn HOT. i could marry him right now and make cute asian babies. i just remembered i had a really weird dream last night. one which involved truckloads of bloggers. damn weird and extremely freaky at one point when there were some things going on which shall not be mentioned here for fear of it actually happening. touch wood wtf.

i hope to meet you someday, mr. wang. so that i can be mrs. wang.

the only reason i am saying this is because i know that fantasy won't be able to catch up with reality.

or can it?

/dum dum duuuuum

if it does, i will delete this post.

btw, i like wes too.

what is this? a convenience store wtf?

ps: it's 2nd jan 10. post-new year.

the other side

hello 2010.

goodbye 2009. you've been awesome.

here's to many more awesomeness for the year 2010 and maybe a little more direction and purpose for me.

hello hello, twothousand&ten or is it twentyten? either ways, hello hello. your arrival has been anticipated and now that it's here, let it be a better one than the previous year in every aspect imaginable.

prepare for takeoff

wow. it's finally here. i don't know why but i've been having this surreal feeling about 2009 coming to an end. like 'i don't believe it's the end' kind of feeling. like a pinch me i must be dreaming kind of feeling. or just slap me senseless and tell me it's not real. maybe i just feel comfortable where i am now and the start of a new year brings with it a whole lot of uncertainties. and in a way, it does.

for the first time in my entire life/existence, i have nothing laid out for me. the world is literally my oyster. i can be anything and do anything and just be without having a thought at the back of my head telling me that this is only temporary and i have better things to do like go back to classes and start the crazy workload. again. i have people asking me, are you gonna do masters? and the same answer always crops up. "at the moment, no. i have no such plans. maybe in the future." but then again, i dont think so either. but that's just the present me talking. who know's what the future me plans.

see. uncertainties. previous new years didn't have this effect on me. maybe because i knew where i was going. if it was during my schooling days, i knew i'll be in school in the new year, getting excited the night before cos i'll be seeing my classmates and seeing teachers again and guessing which teacher will be pregnant. again. trust me when i say this but i have a few teachers whom we called mesin beranak. no joke. every year, she's bound to be pregnant. then when it came to after form5, i knew i was going to college. none of those gap year business. it was just a matter of where i was going. overseas or local? then it came to university and 3 years of my life laid out for me.

but now, the dynamics have changed. i have nothing to fall back on except my ass but that seems to be bruised right now. i am literally a free agent. without a license to kill wtf. i have friends who are so sure of their futures ie applying for honours, masters or securing themselves an interview for a job. what do i have? i sit on the floor and twiddle my thumbs hoping to make a change but never actually doing it. sure, i know what i'm planning to do in june. this time, it's the gap year business. taking time off may be an euphemism for bumming, but whatevs. i live my life. it's not gonna change anybody's DNA.

have a great new years celebration cos i know i will. remember to give a toast to the year that was.

see you on the other side.

the year so far...

it's been a great X'mas, i hope.

now, it's time to mark the end of a year. a year of greatness and a year of not-so-greatness. i think i had a pretty great year. starting with the beginning of the year 2009. i was working at shamu's express. i extended my shift because i didn't want erika to be alone that night plus i could use with the money! it was quite sad actually, me and her in that little booth. then we saw guests wearing these really cool 2oo9 glasses that lighted up! we both really wanted to get one so erika ran off to look for the vendor. we wanted to usher in the new year with style! too bad they were all sold off. very disappointed but nothing we can do. then the countdown began and the fireworks lighted up the night sky. i remember we had to kneel down just so we could see the fireworks. sounds pathetic, i know. no funky 2009 glasses and no new year's party. damn, twas quite sad. at least we had free transport home and an afternoon shift the next day. such simple pleasures.

all that work and i had the bestest time in nyc and san francisco, baybeh! that alone is the one of the greatest highlights of 2009. of course orlando too. that place will forever hold a special place in my heart.

then when the semester started, i took the challenge of taking 5 units. suicidal? hell yes. it was hell exhausting. i didn't feel it when i was doing it but at the end of the semester, that's when it all came crashing. boys and girls, please DON'T fail in uni.

another highlight? turning 21. nuff' said la. not looking forward to 2010 for that alone. or maybe not. ask me when the day comes.

but the most happiest day in 2009 is DEFINITELY finding out that i can graduate. pure, unfiltered, happiness with a capital H. best damn feeling of accomplishing something this ginormous. whoah, a thought just occurred to me. what if i took masters and phD? no need magic mushrooms or space cakes or even alcohol, yo! so happy that i can probably fly like a unicorn.

sadly, the journey ends.

soon.

3 more days, people. make 2009 count.

take me to your mothership

one word: Avatar.

two words: visually stimulating.



two thumbs up.

one huge smile.

money well spent. rm7 for a 2 hour 43 minute movie.

there were a few touching moments in the movie that tugged at my heart and i didn't expect that from a hollywood blockbuster of this proportion. i would have dropped a tear or two if it weren't for the 'loud' commentary i had. this native man sitting next to me made idiotic comments in some parts it RUINED the effect of the movie. idiot! for example, the part where the na'vi's were all praying for grace, native man had the decency to tell his partner that they can all join AKADEMI FANTASIA! serious WTF moment right there. i should have slapped that man senseless. and he kept complaining 'why is this movie so long?' in his native language. there were plenty of moments like these where he made idiotic comments throughout the movie. seriously, cinema etiquette please. do you need a fucking manual on how to behave when watching a movie?

even the bunch of 'kids' behind me made idiotic comments and laughing at the wrong parts! omg what is wrong with people these days?!! don't even know how to watch a movie in a public space. go buy the DVD and make stupid comments and laugh at the sad parts in your private space. don't rain on other people's parade.

ok, end of rant.

call it a skill but the whole movie had a 'predictable' ending that i sorta knew what was gonna happen when they showed vital parts of the film. i don't wanna mention it here in case some of you have not watched it but i think you too will know it when you see it. i don't think it's that hard to miss. or maybe it's a skill i picked up from my undergraduate years. movie watching never wast the same after all those classes.

the visuals was definitely awesome and i reckon it would have been mind-blowing on 3D. i mean i was already awed on the 2D version whatmore the 3D. the movie in a way does reflect what's going on now in our present reality; war, environment, love, politics, consumerism and all those big mumbo jumbo jargons.

the truth hurts so whatchu gonna do about it? go transform yourself into a na'vi and live in pandora that's what! humans are evil beings. truth hurts doesn't it?

sun and moon

the fan is spinning slowly to a stop. the ac is blowing cold air. the night is silent except for that weird noise i hear coming from somewhere in the house. the typing on the keyboard is giving out a soothing tap-tap-tap sound, one of comfort and truth, one of familiarity.

i just had a plate of roti canai with fish curry and a glass of teh o ais limau. i just read someone's blog. i just updated my twitter. i just checked the status updates on fb. i clicked on my inbox.

the night is still except for the whirring of the ac, projecting cold air, cooling the room and ultimately allowing me to sleep comfortably in the quiet night. there's no rain tonight. the shutters are down so i can't see if the stars are out tonight.

i sit by my bedside typing words, allowing my thoughts to flow into this page.

i bid you goodnight now. i have been early to bed since coming back from my trip but tonight, i am back to my old sleeping habits. i don't want that. i quite like waking up at 8 in the morning even though i laze till 9. it tells me that morning is here and it's a brand new day for me to be productive and proactive. at least that's what i aspire to achieve when the sun rises.

goodnight. goodmorning.

fish out of water

at least that's what it felt like for me when i was in taiwan. i was amongst my fellow kind and yet i couldn't understand them. for all i know, they could be speaking greek to me. it was tough to order a cup of pearl bubble milk tea/my ultimate fave by the way. i didn't know how to order it/damn shy. two words: tour guide. my 'hero'. had both of them translate so i knew what was what.

haiyo, damn effin' shy.

will take mandarin lessons, i swear!

my guide had this to say though, "go get yourself a mandarin speaking boyfriend then you can learn". +_______________+

fml.

this love

packed and ready to go.

loads of bus rides to come. but oh wells, i ain't complaining.

the first of many planned trips...

empire state of mind

the weather is killin' me. been having the urge to shower at least 5 times to day +___+ way to save the environment.

i did something out of character today. i offered to take my brother out cycling. i was trying to entertain him AND at the same time brush up on my cycling skillz, yo! and i am proud to say, i can turn and cycle at the same time/woots. don't laugh but before today all i could do was cycle in one direction. if i wanted to turn, i had to manually put my feet on the ground and make that turn. but not anymore/muahahaha.

but i shouldn't be rejoicing laa cos for all i know, i might forget how to turn and just resort to the old method/boo.

i need more practice that's for sure.

today's cycling adventure also brought me for the very first time to the little park in my neighbourhood/gasp, i know. now i know we have a swing and slide and a basketball half-court in my neighbourhood. after almost a year living here then i discover this piece of land. but ignorant i am no more.

i also watched the third mummy film, the one with michelle yeoh and jet li and wtf where is rachel wiez? hello?! nobody can replace rachel wiez. i'm sorry maria bello, that british accent you were trying to pull off/fail. and what's up with the son looking older than brendan fraser?! they just had to make the movie laa. nothing spectacular but then again, you people already know that, don't you?

i also caught running in heels on E! i love shows that are set in the magazine industry ie. ugly betty, running in heels and this other show on channel v called stylista i think/only caught one episode. these shows make me want to work there.

my other fave is giuliana&bill. i think they're the most hilarious couple on reality tv/too bad nick&jessica are no more, they were funny too. watching that show makes me want to have giuliana's job! call me shallow but i would like to work in the media industry that focuses on entertainment and maybe fashion. that much i know. now i gotta think of a way to get into that industry and think of where i wanna be.

i might also want to give advertising a shot.

see, dilemma dilemma. i know i'm still young. my options are still open but still, the pressure to take that first step is...wow. not easy. times like these you wish you're still in uni where all you have to think about is what units you want to take next semester.

but i'm done with that. the studying part. i'm ready for the next phase of life.

bulletproof

i dont need a man.

i want a man.

there's a difference between needs and wants as i've learned in marketing class. and i'm sure the dictionary will tell you the difference too. it's no mystery that all straight/emphasis on the straight now that the world we know has many a variety of sexual orientations\ would want a man. though i do know of some people who need a man.

i'll be honest, i think my perception of romance is really skewed and will probably be off tangent/i'm not really sure what this means but it sounds intelligent\ if measured on the graph. i read way too many chick lits and watch way too many romantic comedies. i sometimes wish my life was like the movies, with background music and hot leading man by my side but life is NOT like the movies, isnt it? cos if it were, we'd be in a perfect world. and the world is far from perfect. just read the newspaper.

everytime i watch a romcom or read a chick lit or anything that has romance in it, i wish i had that. that person to love and want to make things work for life with. yeah, i know there will be tough times and rough times thrown in for good dramatic effect cos gawd knows life is full of dramas but so be it. i wouldn't have it any other way. i remember reading that when couples argue, it shows that they care enough to want to fight about it, to fight for their love. i so agree with that. cos when you don't fight, that's when the loving stops. that's when you don't give a damn anymore to want to fight for it.

so i guess, fighting is good? haha. no, not really. i mean petty fights are just ridiculous. i know of couples who don't seem to have that spark anymore and yet are still in that relationship. but who am i to judge. a relationship involves two parties not three or four. outsiders can only guess and make assumptions about said relationships. if the two that are in it are fine with how things are, i guess we should just let them be. it's their happiness anyways. nothing to do with us. like my friend would say, "it won't affect my DNA"

true that.

i hate how people ask "how come you don't have a boyfriend?","are you picky/choosy?" . yeah, the million dollar question and the rhetorical question goes hand in hand. what answers are these people expecting me to give them? i eat boys for dessert and of cos i'm picky, you wouldn't eat a rotten apple, would you? and why shouldn't i be picky when i might eventually marry this man and wake up next to him every morning for the rest of my life.

life's tough questions answered. gimme my book deal and talk show already.

a conversation with a friend brought my attention to this;

guys are intimidated by our natural awesomeness or status which doesn't really matter when you're just getting to know someone but then again, we're living in the real world. you either have to be from an average-and-below income family or filthy-rich income family to score yourself a man. because those in the average-and-above seem to be having it tough/this is based on the statistics of people i know aka my acquaintances\ so don't quote me on this. the average-and-above are in limbo.

you have to drive a certain car and dress a certain way and speak and act a certain way for guys to be interested enough to initiate the chase/based on personal observation\

maybe it's best if the guy knew less about you which is probably why a mystery girl/guy is such a turn on. you know nuts about this person which makes the chase exciting. like cluedo, the whudunnit game. instead of a murder, it's a guessing game of is this my life partner?

don't you love board games? there's a game called the game of life where you build your career and family all with the roll of a dice and a spin of a wheel in a car you move along the board adding family members and accumulating wealth and health. if only life were that simple.

i know i claim to live the simple life but really, is there really simplicity in this mad and complicated world? i have tons of questions in my head, tons of options to choose from and huge life altering decision to make. does any of that sound simple?

all i'm asking for is someone to lean on, not rely on. is that so hard to ask?

all the right moves

WOOHOO. it is now OFFICIAL!

i can officially graduate. no more scares or second doubts/huge sigh of relief.

you have no idea how scared i was despite passing my exams, there was still a nagging feeling at the back of my mind. you see, MonU has this credit point system where you have to have a certain amount of first year units, second year units and third year units in order to graduate. huge hassle cause certain units are offered in second and third year units so you have to choose wisely which year you want to take that unit in.

so of course in my final year, i did the calculations and made sure i enrolled in the correct year. but somehow, i had this itch in the back of my mind telling me that i MIGHT have miscalculated and will not be able to graduate in time +____+ and to make matters worst, my course coordinator made a comment on my fb status which scared the living daylights out of me/not funny!

i did the calculations AGAIN in my head and was DAMN EFFING sure i calculated correctly.

LO AND BEHOLD, i DID do it correctly because i got the green light :DDD

so there you have it, you are now reading the blog of a Bachelor of Arts (Communication & Writing) graduate/not officially yet but still. hehe.

quite proud of myself really. i have to say that this is one of my greatest achievements in life. you have no idea how happy i was when i saw my results that told me i can graduate/before all the not-enough credit points drama. the happiness was just on a high that i couldn't control.

of course, life had to throw me a curveball and bring me the flu to add to the joy but i have been pumping in loads of vitamin C and h20.

i celebrated with a big juicy steak and margaritas!

life has been good. i'm still looking around, doing some soul searching but i know i'll be fine through God's grace cause i wouldn't be where i am right now if it weren't for Him :)

:DDD

it's official :D

i want to pamper myself man.

no way.

craaaaap.

i feel the oncoming of a flu +_____________+

shit. faster drink loadsss of water.

vampires, werewolves and a swan.

dont judge me.

but i've watched new moon...twice!

zomg, the only other movie i watched twice in the cinema was white chicks. don't ask. oh waits. i watched it on dvd then i watched it in the cinema, so that doesnt count.

zomg, so for the first time in my life, i watched a movie twice in the cinema. same movie somemore!!! total fanatic :O

but i have a valid reason for watching the second time. some background story:

i introduced my mother to the twilight books. i think for the past week all she's done is plop herself on the couch and just read read read. she's in the last book by the way. she watched the first movie, read the second book and told me she wanted to watch the movie.

so as a loving and doting daughter, of course i'll take my mother out to the movies! she enjoyed it btw. and she's team edward haha. i know i've said on fb that i'm team jacob but that was the visuals talking. after reading the book (rereading eclipse btw) i'm totally, completely and commit-fully team edward :O how can i not be? jacob is fine and all but edward is...he sparkles man. nuff' said.

LOL.

ok that's not the reason la. but it's the way he loves her man. like epic love. fuyoh. things like these just dont happen in reality so must live vicariously through bella.




dont judge me. lemme tell you something, i'm a sucker for romance. there. the secret's out of the bag. but i dont read those harlequin romance or mills&boons romance. those kind i tak boleh tahan.


so if u ask me what i thought of new moon. i will say i preferred it when compared to twilight. guess you can see better effects and the colour is more vivid. the first movie seemed darker and moodier.


don't ask about the acting la cos this movie is not out to win an oscar anyways. i like the soundtrack though but somehow it gives off an indie-ish sorta vibe. i would think that more mainstream bands would be featured on the soundtrack. the only mainstream band is muse but that's cause stephanie meyer loves the band (don't ask me how i know such information).

yeah. so sue me la you twilight haters.

build me a castle

i am a very happy child for i have finally gotten my hands on a book i've been searching high and low for.

i enjoyed the original and now, i'm reading the rewritten text (i'm sure there's a proper term prescribed to this form of writing but i'm too lazy to get the textbook and look for the proper term). it definitely reminds me of writing experiments. i'm actually missing that class and dr. sharon :(

so my days are filled with reading and facebook and twitter and the random sites i chance upon.

so productive, i know.

i did manage to catch a couple of movies this month. 2012, time traveler's wife and new moon. no guesses for which is my favourite :O

let's hop & skip to another world, just me & you

CLICK!

if you must know

i've taken to blogging in another site for now.

time for a modification in life.

worry not, i'll blog here too, so don't worry that pretty head of yours.

marshmallows and candycane

i just applied to graduate :O

$170 to mark the end of this chapter of my life :O :O :O

so the age-old question now will be;

1. what's your plans?
2. planning to do masters?
3. looking for a job already?
4. what do you want to do?
5. etc. etc. etc...

gimme a break, people! i just finished and the last thing i want to do is start thinking of the future. if i knew what i wanted to do, i wouldn't be in this position here right now, would i? i'd probably be off in my swivel chair in my own office with a personal assistant who makes me coffee and tells me my mother is on line 1. am i there now? no. so just lay it down low with the questions, people. lemme breathe and take in life. life without the plans. life without the path and directions laid out before me on a red carpet.

i've had that for like 15 years or more. from the moment i entered pre-school up till my undergraduate years, it has all been planned out. now is the only time probably where nothing is planned out. where the possibilities are literally endless. scary and daunting yet exciting and limitless.

and if you must know, i'm currently enjoying the life of the unemployed. where i wake up in the morning with nothing to do unless it's to meet friends or do something inane like chores.

wah, what's not to enjoy? the next time i'll probably enjoy this lifestyle again is when i'm retired :O with grandkids for company!

the other day, when i was watching ugly betty, i had this sudden rush of 'OH EM GEE, what day is it today?!!!'

that, my friends, is the life...

and she's so high, high above me...

i am ALIVE!

i dont think i've felt this free before. no kidding.

i'm like a blank canvas.

high on life and what it's gonna bring me. i feel like i can do anything...

and that's a pretty great feeling, a pretty great feeling indeed :)

alpha & omega

in 3 days time, the start and end of my finals :|

wishmeluckthanks.

if i had to choose between her and the sun, i would be one nocturnal son of a gun

will it be irresponsible of me if i said i wanted a break after my exams? as in not do anything AT ALL kind of break.

because, where i'm from, apparently a break means i 'help' out in the business. not that i am ungrateful or trying to piss them off or anything like that, but for goodness sake and to risk sounding like a spoilt, pampered bitch, i really just wanna do nothing with any form of responsibilities attached to it.

there IS a part of me though that wants to apply for internships and there a couple of sites that i know of who are looking.

so really, what should i do? a part of me wants this and another part wants that.

but would it be irresponsible of me if wanted to do nothing at all even for just a couple of months?

nothing compares to you

in record time, i completed my essay 3 days, ok fine, 2 days in advance! *pats self on back wtf* that is if i didnt screw it up. since i could write about anything and everything within the boundaries of the malaysian cinema scope.

it's a fun class btw. for lectures, we watch malaysian films and i have to say, this makes me appreciate malaysian cinema and also fuels my desire to film a short film. one day, i say! there are many a hidden gems in the local film scene. one of the assignments requires us to prepare a storyboard for our greatest malaysian film. the presentation was last week and i say, good stuff generated in the span of 13 weeks.

sigh. i think i'm gonna miss uni life after all :(

it's been my life and more for the past 3 years. it's the only stable thing in my life. and now, that stability is going to be destabilized till i find myself a stable job. which btw my mother has already began the search for. she thrust a job ad in ma face this morning! like whoah, slow down momma. i haven't handed up my essay or sat for my exams yet. :S

the pressure is ON!

what's a better way to cap of the week of hard-mind-numbing-labour than to go shopping with my girlfriend, shee ann! pure shopping goodness wtf. i have succumbed to the consumer culture. no escape i'm afraid. there's a reason why its called retail therapy. don't quote on me this, kids!

shopping in bangsar isn't as fun when you know you can get the same stuff for a fraction of the price in bangkok! but because i'm here and not in bangkok, i caved in and spent...rm xxx +__+ don't tell my momma, yo!

holiday to bangkok anyone? i'm recruiting traveler's now wtf.

the best thing i bought however is this rectangular velcro thingy you "piak" onto your hair. i think it's the greatest thing invented EVER! it's the shizznit, yo!

...

ok, i'm restless now. stupid connection is so slow, my pet tortoise walks faster from the MonU carpark to the Media Lab than loading my fb page. and that's a looooong walk. trust me. i used to compare with my friends how far we parked and we would laugh at the ones who park way way back. jealous glares would be directed at the ones who parked near of coz.

:(

quite. sad. now.

oohh oohh, i'm very happy to have finally downloaded sinead o'connor's nothing compares to you and lisa loeb's stay. the connection in the comp lab is my best friend *strokes imaginary comp lab* and have you people heard the cast of glee singing bon jovi's it's my life and usher's confessions? it's the shiizzznittt, yo! brilliant those people who mixed it! i want to be a writer on glee. how do i apply? soon to be graduate looking for position thankiu :)

notice i was sad and then now i'm happy.

fuhh...see what i mean when i said i'm restless. thankgoodness the connection does not affect blogging.

i sleep at the oddest hours that i can't sleep early +__+

*wills self to sleep NOW*

stay

bittersweet.

i had my very last class today *tear*

no more walks to classrooms or lecture halls or labs. 3 years and this is how it ends.

on the one hand, i am actually epically excited about graduating. my entire life of education leads to this one pivotal point in my life, entire existence. all those late nights and many more late nights as well as thousands of word counts and i'm finally at the end of this chapter.

epic joy!

i dont care what people tell me about how much they miss doing assignments and going for classes, right now, i'm just excited that it's over!

and i also handed up my second last assignment. yes, despite it being the end of semester, i still have an essay write. hey, they gotta suck us dry before they set us off into the real world, right?

*assignment mode ON*

almost ending

with pain, therein lies hope.

how do you know?

"i believe that our first love is the truest love of all" - yasmin ahmad

i wouldn't know if the above quote is true or not because i don't have the experience of a first love to back me up but i would love to think that the above quote is true. first love is the time where you put yourself out there for the first time. the first time you let yourself be vulnerable. the first time you experience pain and heartache. the first time you experience a great joy you never knew you could feel. the first of maybe every possible emotions and feelings you're bound to feel when experiencing a first love. the first time you let yourself love another without hiding any part of you because you want to share every single detail and part of yourself with this one special person.

i want this. i want to experience this wonderful feeling people make movies about and people sing about and people write about.

do i want to risk getting hurt if it doesn't work out? do i want to risk feeling that love is the most over-rated feeling in the world? do i want to risk never loving anyone else again if the first love doesn't work out the way i wanted and expected it to?

yes. cause life is too short.

what about perfect timing? the right time to let yourself be at your most vulnerable? there is no such thing as a right time. every minute of your life is ticking by.

"this is your life and it's ending one minute at a time." - the narrator, fight club

dis.con. n sl-win dwn

effin' pissed with my connection. i thought i could finally watch the latest episode of vamp diaries but no. false hope. and my second attempt at dressing up in looklet.com failed because of the bloody connection >:(

geramnya.

i think the days incident has given me a wake up a call. i think i can finally be distorted in my flow of thoughts and writing. i hope i did it right this time.

plan b.

look ma'!

literally smitchterally blahh

if i had to choose, today probably tops the list of one of the worst days ever. so much for leaving with a bang. everything seems to be falling apart. is this a sign of what my future is going to be like?

or more of me realizing i cannot do everything and that i'm no super(wo)man. that i cant be good at everything. that i too have a weakness and it's in the form of wrtthreefourtwotwo. if anything, i can be sure of this, it can and will be the death of me.

unless of course i buckle up and write the randomest shyt ever.

dont be literal. rule of thumb.

dis.con.nec.t myself with my train of thoughts. let the words go. let them roam free of their own accord. let them do the talking and shouting and screaming. just dont mean what you say. literally. make yourself less understandable and more ambiguous.

that's the way it moves.

the way it shakes.

the way it flicks.

that's the way i should be.

so, if i had to choose, today definitely tops the list of worst days.

ever.

and no. kanye can't interrupt this.

i spy with my eyes that this blogger...

is not a happy camper. i have 2 major assignments left in the final weeks of my semester and i cannot wait for it to come to an end!

an end for good! *fingers crossed*

the only joy i have in my life right now is:

the big bang theory

hands down the bestest most hilarious show EVER!

the vampire diaries

my latest guilty pleasure!

i finished watching true blood and according to a pretty credible source, the new season will only begin in june 2010! another year ohmaigad! so i have stefan and damon to fulfill my weekly eye dose of guilty pleasure.

i wanna watch (500) days of summer. doesn't help that every review i read screams greatest flick of the year!

i like potatoes

today was probably the first in weeks where i got to plonk myself on the couch and channel surf. the feeling was euphoric wtf. looking forward to doing so after finals wtfwtf. i am so ambitious!

till death do us part

i just came back from a relative's wedding dinner. haven't been to a wedding dinner in quite some time. this was one was a refreshing change from the usual ones i've been to. there was a speech given by the maid of honour and father of the bride as well as a speech by the bride&groom themselves. they did dwell a little about their courtship and i thought it was really sweet. at least we know a little about how they got to where they are today.

"darling, you are the love of my life"

then there was the customary yam seng and i have to say, it was amusing to see the angmoh do it!

i have dreamt about my wedding when i was young and i have to say, my plans then and now have changed. but who knows when that will happen or if it'll ever happen. there was a time i was itching to get into a relationship so that i can move on with my life according to how the discourse is today but then i've come to realize that i don't have to path my life according to the discourse. i can break free. but then again, structuralism will tell me that i'm in fact not breaking free and doing it my own way yada yada yada. depressing stuff, i know.

the entrance was reminiscent of that youtube video where the bridesmaids and groomsmen danced their way in. i absolutely loved that entrance and thought it was ingenious! take that and transfer it here, epic fail. they weren't really into it. they were moving parts of their bodies i.e. hands clapping to the beat of the song and twirling and turning but they weren't really INTO it. if you're gonna do something novel as to dance your way in, do it with pizazz and oomph! go all out then it'll be a hit. i just thought that they could have done so much better. the bride was really into it though, that's for sure. and i guess our culture is not used to this sort of entrance, everyone didn't really know how to react cos when the bride&groom reached their table there was a 2 second, maybe more, awkward moment of silence. the emcee had to remind everyone to clap. i felt for the bride. very awkward indeed. looks like the older generation have to catch up with the young ones.

i want a crazy ass entrance too!

i think weddings should be a celebration and hence a party like atmosphere with close and intimate family and friends should be the way to go! why would i want to celebrate this one special occasion in my life with distant relatives whose names i do not know and who doesn't really know me. y'know why? to please our parents that's why.

wedding dinners are fun. sometimes i like to be all cynical and sometimes i like all the romance behind it all and hope one day for my fairytale wedding. sighh...like some 5 year old kid all over again.

now, i look forward to attending weddings of people that i know i.e. friends!

my dear friends, go get yourselves hitched. it's our generation now ;P

i think i should know

watched fight club today. i love that film. didn't realize how long it was. it was long. worth your money i reckon. i think this was the film that introduced me to edward norton. not brad pitt, though i think he looks way better in that film. i never really got on the bandwagon about how hot and whatever pitt was though i think he makes pretty babies with angelina.

ever since eating the cupcake marina bought yesterday, i have been craving them. so i bought myself two today and happily gobbled them after dinner which makes me sound like a pig but nevermind. pig ma pig lorrr...don't judge me. i think reading kim kardashian's tweet about famous cupcakes also contributed to the cupcake craving. the word cupcake is dancing all over in my mind now. make it stop. please. if i eat anymore i will look like one and we don't want that now, do we?

i am happy happy right now cos i have completed my checklist for today. sucha good feeling! bask in my glory, people!

bask in it!

and they all fall down

ever felt like everything in your head is a jumbled mess and as you try to pick the pieces, you realize you're in deeper shit than you thought you were.

yeah.

that's what it is.

i have so much on my mind it's difficult to pinpoint exactly what it is that is bothering me more. the fact that i have so much work still to do or the fact that everything i've been working so hard for is quickly coming to end.

there's too much on my mind and very very little time.

pina colada & jalapenos

i am delighted that i have at least completed one of my assignments in record time. okay, maybe not completely completed. partially, yes but still. the writing part is done so i'm very proud of that :) after yesterdays depressing-ness, today i have to say was a good day! so i'm happy happy.

and i spent way more than i should on food. more than i spend on days when i'm having class. i suppose when hunger strikes, hunger strikes!

i was just watching gossip girl and i've come to realize that everything on it is so dramatized and unrealistic yet so delicious. to be honest, i remember watching it and hating almost everyone on the show cause they got on my nerves so bad. yet, i still continued on watching because i wanted to know how it ends. not to say that i absolutely love the show for the storyline or its characterizations. i love that the show is my 4o minutes of guilty pleasure. of experiencing new york the way i wished i could experience it. of experiencing the different fashion styles the way i wish i could. it's my window to a world of fabulous-ness.

because really, other than that, there's nothing much i can talk about besides how totally cute blair and chuck look together whenever they appear. really, we can't be talking about how great it is that nate is finally dating so and so because 2 episodes later, they're gonna break up like they're on new york fashion week picking their favourite designer. we also can't possibly talk about how great that serena is constantly screwing her life up or how jenny who is greater than thou is trying to demolish the hierarchy oh great blair built and will finally succeed this time because really that's be done numerous times too. and dan, pffft, possibly the ultimate player in the mix who started out so well. totally giving nate a run for his money.

yawn.

yet, i still go back to that show weekly. the power of pretty people dressed up in pretty clothing.

why am i talking about this? right, because i was watching it halfway when they tell me my time limit is up! geramnya.

/end of rant.

you must be wondering why pina colada & jalapenos for a title?

pina colada because marina was playing her songs and this was one of them. old school classical cool, yo! belinda had this to say, 'is there anyone in here who isn't dead?' HAHAHA x infinity wtf

and jalapenos because they were trying out various ways of pronouncing it. exciting times in store whenever the 3 of us are together :)

makes you want to be my friend, eh?

history lesson 101

in my almost 3 years of undergraduate studies, i have NEVER asked for an extension. EVER! i take pride in the fact that i can complete my work by the dateline. i was going to step out of uni proclaiming that i never had handed up my assignment late or asked for an extension.

today is a historical day.

today, i broke that very thing which made me who i am today. the one thing i could be proud of. the thing i could boast and gloat about. the very thing which is the essence of my entire undergraduate years, is now unattainable. i have been dethroned. and i doubt anyone can take my place because my other partner in crime, marina has also been dethroned. we are now just like everybody else.

no more gloating. no more boasting.

today marks a black spot in my cleanclean slate. i shall go cry in a corner right now.

today, i also realized that only a lecturer can make your heart beat so fast it will make your entire body vibrate, palms sweat, face turn pale, start pulling your hair and make stab-me-in-the-heart gestures and go down on your knees screaming 'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!' and beg to be killed right now so that the misery can end.

yes. today is a historical day indeed.

i even had my suicidal mode on. optimism just flew out the window and in came pessimism to rescue the day. fun stuff the things you learn in university.

what you say

after 3 days of bliss, i come home with an upset stomach, body ache and internal body heatyness so panas it will make your water boil. now i know why some people say they need a holiday to recover from their holiday.

i'm feeling better now, thanks for asking.

i think the mid-sem break went by too fast but don't they always? i'd like to think i spent it pretty well :)

if anything, it was especially "educational" for me, as the rest can attest to. sudah boleh kahwin dah wtf. a crash course in life lessons.

right now, i shall bask in the final hours of my mid-sem break. honestly, the coming weeks will probably be the craziest weeks. i iz sked now. presentations, major projects, major essay and final exam. phwoarrr...believe you me when i say i cannot wait to finish and graduate.

during dinner, my dad made me cough and choke on my drink. i forgot what he said but it was hilarious. that tends to happen to me. alot.

nu die rek ti on

ch-ch-ch-check it out! wh-wh-wh-what's it all about!

something went wrong with my previous skin :( i miss that elephant already.

today marks the first day of raya and so i went to my friends place for lunch and storytelling. killer combination wtf.

and what stories i heard.

let's just say, i am way glad i live such a simple life with friends that don't give me no drama. sure, i may have my fair share of craziess when it comes to friends but really, what i go through seems infantile compared to what i've heard. really, you think you've left high school but you haven't.

the things i heard today made me say "omg, i never knew such words could come out of a person's mouth" to "this only happens on tv. oh wait, tv reflects reality anyways" among many others.

in the words of my dear friend, "i live a life truly blessed" and i thank God everyday for that.

friday. the busiest day of the week. yet fulfilling at the same time. especially when it comes to handing up assignments and then going home knowing that the weekend has started though it only starts after 6 but that's alright. you get what you get.

have a good looong weekend. we all deserve it :)

was going through an unopened file of songs i got from a friend and found some lovely gems that i have not heard in awhile.

i read 2 graphic novels. american born chinese and the curious case of benjamin button.

i'm still reading chuck palahniuk's haunted.

borrowed the kite runner.

watched beauty and the beast. epic love story there.

this is life, post-major assignment. very short term break but a break nevertheless. i shall savour it before the next round comes along.

absolutely love the song simple life by carolina liar.

i went dvd hunting with my dad yesterday. not the pirated ones. we went to speedy to look for grease because i absolutely LOVE that movie! it was my dad who introduced me to the world of grease lightning and saturday night fever.

i was also secretly looking for breakfast at tiffany's because i absolutely LOVE audrey hepburn and to my horrors, i've only ever seen her in that one film! blasphemy! so i wanted to reacquaint myself with her movie by buying breakfast at tiffany's and then moving on to her other films.

unfortunately, they have none of the movies we were looking for. seriously! classics like those and they don't have em'. another blasphemy!

so i began browsing around and pointed at all the old movies and asked my dad if he has watched them.

one of them i pointed at was gone with the wind. old school classical cool.

he did watch it. and he goes on to tell me how he and all his friends fell asleep watching it but the girls were all wide-eyed! haha. so my dad proceeded to get me the dvd so i can watch it :)



at the same time, i saw a audrey hepburn movie that i watched a lil' of called paris when it sizzles. i couldn't resist and got myself the dvd.




so now, i have two classics to watch :)

now, to get my hands on breakfast at tiffany's and grease!

the end of my hellish week! woots.

i can now breathe easy again. it may not be the end of the ends but at least this one particular hurdle down makes me breathe easier.

*inhale exhale*

i hate the part where i have to slave through countless websites looking for legitimate resources to use for my 2.5k word essay.

that's due friday.

and is worth 50% of my life, i mean grade.

doesn't help that i did nuts today. all i did was keep my bed warm. my bed probably has my body shape permanently sculpted into :/

this afternoon, i came home, plopped myself down in front of the TV, watched air force one (the one with harrison ford) and was prepared for a thrilling ride manatau i woke up to see jonas brothers wtf.

i fell asleep!

and now, i'm not sleepy. just came back from yc and now all i wanna do is stay out and do mindless things. but of course, i'm a girl. girls have restrictions. somehow, it feels like the nights belong to the other gender :( we're left with the sun and the opposite, with the moon. heh. my analogy chun or not wtfwtf.

nothing's good on radio now :(

i think i'll watch dollhouse before i sleep.

ooh..just thought i should say i'm having a good hair day right now! too bad i'm home now and it's 12.45am. or else i'll flaunt my hair around.

i'm listening to jordin sparks 'battlefield'.

why does love always feel like a battefield?

because i'm trying not to head-bang the wall i thought i should share with you this incident which happened a few weeks ago, as narrated by my friend, marina on my fb status.

We were all standing at the lift when Belinda uses her bottle to push the lift buttons to void 'germs' (H1n1 kind)Then on the return journey Nat forgot and used her finger to push the button and then said 'omgosh omgosh i touched it I touched it!' and promptly ran to Belinda and wiped her finger on belinda's shirt!

We nearly died laughing.

the things we do :D

i didn't skip my 9am class, in case you were curious/wondering/concerned. but i was late. heh. i blame it on the traffic although technically i woke up late but details like that don't really matter, right?

good news for the day, i'm finally starting to type new sentences for my proposal. i felt inspired in class when dr. s was talking about it. unfortunately, the inspiring talk evaporated on the way home wtf.

speaking of which, i dont know how they do it. puasa-ing, i mean. i had breakfast/lunch/brunch at 11am and was starving by 5pm! kowtow man! though a friend did mention that it was easier when its the ramadhan month simply because i guess. or maybe it's mind over matter.

is it me or does time flies? i think time has taken a first class on the now defunct concord. a zoom and a swish and we're now in the month of september. wake me up when september ends (green day, year forgotten wtf). it's week 7 already :S

ohh...did i mention i'm going to arthur's day :D excited-nya! my second concert in my entire existence. got a concert high! i think concerts are the shiznit!

right now, i'm doing way too many things at once. trying to multitask to the super max, trying to hit the maximum growth wtf.

which reminds me, thank goodness i ordered that mocha during dinner. i'm not sure if it's the caffeine working its magic on me or if it's just me feeling the stress of a looming due date ahead but i'm up and doing my work :D sigh, simple things like this and i'm easily satisfied. really, i'm not that hard to please lol.

really, imma bout to ram my head through a brick wall >:(

frustrated. beyond. words.

i think i have it in me to start but i'm just sitting duck here not giving two hoots about the damn proposal. just because i can.

and i'm even contemplating on skipping my 9am class. just because i can.

just. because.

sigh. i can't get no work done in my space. i need another space.

notice how i can throw all sorts of excuses out but cannot just focus on the task and just do it. my mind feels like its all over the place. i cant stop it from running all around. how ironic. this is exactly what writing experiments is all about and yet, the first assignment is not asking you to be experimental. it's so technical imma burst your balloon, kid!